STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
