So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
