I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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