He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
that is very illegal...i love you.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
