Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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