I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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