i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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