We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
