I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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