dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
