I wanna bring you to show and tell
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
