why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize