where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Randomize
