Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize