My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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