I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize