If i come over, it means nothing
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
