i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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