So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
