It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize