i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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