So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
