He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
