i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
