sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I need a beard to bite.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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