i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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