Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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