that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
