is your mom at the bar?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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