So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
