so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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