mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
