Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
