I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
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