Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
