I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
