he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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