Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
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