Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
