Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
what day is it and did you see me today?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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