East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
