Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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