Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
