I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
she woke up with a sticky ear
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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