Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
