I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
