I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
