We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
