ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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