Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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